What Difference the Color of the Collar?

by Amy on April 16, 2010 · 6 comments

[Match.com says:  You’ve got mail.  Ooh, how exciting!  Hit “read new mail.”]

I was reading your profile and see a down-to-earth woman who wants what we all want, someone sane, stable, secure and not wanting to cat around. BUT, I can see where guys would be intimidated by your stature.  I picture myself, as a fireman, meeting a Dr./Lawyer??  Since I work in a very high-society city, I see that we are looked down upon a lot.  Curious to see what your outlook is on guys that are “blue collar.”

[Hit “reply.”]  Dear Guy with the Blue Collar:

First, don’t you know that a fireman is the best kind of man?  Strong, good-to-the-bone, rescuer of cats from trees and babies from burning buildings, and somehow always in the top ten percent on the hotness scale?  I mean, the highlight of the Southern Women’s Show each year is the firefighter fashion show (and we women don’t care a whit about the fashions).  After I spend ten hours each day drafting website terms of use or debating who owns what copyright, the last person I want to come home to at the end of the day is another lawyer.  I’d much prefer a fireman waiting for me, maybe in his uniform.

Second, I don’t see myself as a white-collar type.  Not only did I never look good in white-collared shirts (I prefer floral blouses), I was born a farmer’s daughter in a little house on the prairie.  I only acquired this “stature” (J.D.) you speak of after sharing my bed with a highlighter for three years of law school and shelling out the equivalent of a house that I’m still paying off.

Third, get over it.  Yes, I do require a certain level of smarts and manners in my man to keep me interested.  The color of his collar reveals nothing on these points…I know many a lawyer and doctor who cheat and belch their way through life.  Money, I’ll be honest:  I’d love to find a millionaire to pay off my student loans, and I’d love to win the lottery, too.  But I’d rather strike gold in the love department if given the choice.  Mostly, though, I require that my man have a sturdy backbone.  Intimidated?  Really?  Man up!  That’s what I like about you fireman types in the first place!  Scared by little old me?  GET OVER IT.

Sincerely,

A Tough, Soft, Smart, Ditzy, Strong, Vulnerable Woman.

P.S. Love the “cat around” line.  Must borrow it sometime.

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

valerieb April 16, 2010 at 10:31 am

I love everything about your reply to this fire-fighter man! Interested to see if he’s ballsy enough to write back to you…

Amy April 18, 2010 at 7:22 am

Thanks! Poor guy…didn’t know what he’d gotten himself into with me.

Marcie April 19, 2010 at 12:34 pm

Hope he responds! Is he strong enough to be your man?

Olleymae April 19, 2010 at 8:16 pm

omg this is hilarious!!!! Did he write back??? How does he not know that firemen are hott?

I can’t wait to read your book now, you’ve got a great, spunky voice to your writing :)

Amy April 22, 2010 at 1:51 pm

Haven’t heard from the fireman lately! A weak backbone, remember? Olleymae, likewise!

Ashleighf April 25, 2010 at 4:26 am

After reading a couple of your blog entries, I do believe you and I share a commonality: We are too hot for some men to handle!

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