What’s Your Internet Dating Personality? A Quiz

by Amy on June 14, 2010 · 1 comment

Grab a pen and see if any of these Internet dating personalities hits close to home…

The day you sign up for Match.com, you get three dozen winks and 14 emails.  This makes you feel:

a. Flattered by all the attention.

b. Uncomfortable.  Freaks with too much time on their hands!

c. Busy.  Better get to responding to all of these nice fellows.  They took the time to contact you, after all.

d. Unsurprised.  Your profile currently shows that you’re not only a new member but also a recently active member, so your account is hot right now because of the way the Match system is set up.

One of your eHarmony suitors wants to skip over the essay-writing and the email flirting straight to the meet-over-a-cup-of-coffee stage.  Your reaction:

a. You can see his point, so you promptly schedule a coffee date for the next day and send him your email address so the two of you can text each other constantly until then.  

b. Hell, no!  What if he shows up with an ice pick in his back pocket and follows you home after the date?

c. You don’t want to hurt his feelings by acting all paranoid, so you agree, reminding yourself to let a friend know where and when you’re meeting him.

d. There’s a reason for the essay process.  You trust eHarmony’s track record and won’t buck the system.  So you get back to crafting that essay on your favorite vacation spot.

A guy with eight of your dealbreakers immediately apparent in his profile (the majority of his profile photos are set at Hooter’s, he can’t spell his own name, he still lives with his mother, he has a snake for a pet…) sends you an adoring message on Plenty of Fish.  You:

a. Respond immediately with a flirtatious message about what you’re currently wearing. Hey, no one’s perfect.

b. Make fun of the message, and the guy, with your friends, then ignore it.

c. Send him a friendly response but vow to yourself that you won’t let it get so far that you’ll have to meet him in person.

d. Email him succinctly with all the reasons why you’re not suited for each other (listing the snake first).

 You are a woman looking for:

a. Men.

b. Men between the ages of 34 and 35 with brown-black hair sprinkled with silver, and violet eyes, who has his Ph.D. and makes more than $150,000 a year, and likes sushi.

c. Men of all religions, creeds, political leanings, races, shapes, and sizes.

d. Men between the ages of 30 and 45 who live within 100 miles of your hometown who don’t smoke.

Your Internet dating username is:

a. Smurfette

b. Tennessee845

c. LovingLife

d. Perfect4U

If you chose mostly a’s, you are an Eager Internet Dater.  Your profile always reads “online now.”  You give all of your Internet suitors a chance, finding something to like about each of them, as long as they like you.   

If you chose mostly b’s, you are a Reluctant Internet Dater.  You don’t know why you had to wind up single at this age and now must subject yourself to this humiliation.  But it seems like the only option left, so here you are.  Not that you have any intention of actually going on any real dates with any of these losers.  Gross.  Unless the perfect guy happens to come along.  Which likely won’t happen.

If you chose mostly c’s, you are a Too-Nice Internet Dater.  You’re one of those people who says hello to every person that passes on the street.  Likewise, you feel obligated to respond to every Internet suitor, because you don’t want him to feel bad, and he wrote you such a flattering message.  You’ll be able to say no when the time comes…really.

If you chose mostly d’s, you are a Career Internet Dater.  You treat it like a job, and you know all the rules and follow them to the letter.  You have no problem kicking a suitor to the curb and letting him know why, but you do let him know why, because that’s the proper protocol.

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Julie Mallen June 15, 2010 at 9:56 am

A guy with eight of your deal-breakers immediately apparent in his profile (the majority of his profile photos are set at Hooter’s, he can’t spell his own name, he still lives with his mother, he has a snake for a pet…) sends you an adoring message on Plenty of Fish. You: Me??? I am
LMAO!!! what great wit thanks for making my day reading this!!!
‘-)

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